Beekeeper’s Guilt

5 Feb

Yesterday I knitted a few puffs for my Beekeeper’s quilt (a Ravelry link) for the second time since I bought the pattern. I feel a vague sense of duty towards this project and I’d like to get over that. Nothing kills the desire to knit faster than guilt about it.

Mm yeah, maybe I should aim for a pillow or something, instead of a quilt. For a good-sized blanket you need over 380 of these little buggers, and I think I have 16.

The pattern says it’s best if you knit these things when you’re waiting in line or anytime you have a moment to knit when you’re out and about. But I don’t have moments like that. I hardly ever wait in line (when in the waiting room at the doctor’s, I’m perfectly happy just sitting there, not doing anything), the bus ride to my school lasts all of 10 minutes and it’s always so crowded… It just doesn’t work (believe me, I’ve tried).

When I see my friends, I prefer showing them that I really am paying attention and one of the ways I can do that is not knitting. I know this might be controversial among knitters, but to me, knitting is the same as using your computer or phone, or watching television or what have you. You’re not paying full attention to the person who’s actually there. If the other person is fine with that, then fine. But personally, while I can and do listen to others when I knit, it does make me more passive in a conversation.

Besides, I don’t like it when I go to the trouble of actually going out and seeing someone, and they decide to read a magazine (for instance) instead of paying attention to me. It feels disrespectful of my time… It’s just, excuse me, all I did was take the time to come see you, would you pay me the courtesy of noticing me? I imagine me knitting would feel the same to others.

So I guess I’ve discovered one of the reasons my beekeeper’s quilt is going nowhere fast.

I’m just learning to think that I don’t mind. It can take years for all I care. I’m just glad to have a project to which I can designate all my leftover sockyarn. And the puffs are kind of squishy and cute.

Now I can put the puffs back in the puffing basket, and forget about them for another 5 months.

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